I Secretly Hoped our Daughter was a Sociopath

A guest post from the Mrs.  – See you on Monday! x Darcie


I was told that I was slacking, that I promised to help with this blog, and that I needed to start helping because I’ve only written one blog in the last year.

I think Darcie just wants to see who gets better ratings me or her.  Fine honey, the gauntlet has been thrown.


I enjoy being prepared.  I would have made a good boy scout.  I like to know what is coming and how to deal with it.

Need to distill water from your urine.  I have you covered.

With this in mind, I knew that our cute cuddly baby would eventually turn into a spirited toddler.  When Loren was around 13 months old, I started reading books about raising toddlers and reading mommy blogs about the different obstacles I was about to face.  And I did learn a few things.  Like the terrible twos, they usually start around 18 months.  WTH I needed to get a game plan stat. I was going to be prepared!

I didn’t need to read a book to know that toddlers have big emotions.  Bigger than they can handle.  Thus, the terrible twos.  I was ready for the tantrums, the fit throwing won’t-get-off-the-Wal-mart-floor, kicking, biting, and yelling.  I was ready for her to yell, “NO!” to everything.

What I wasn’t ready for was Loren.  She’s so… sensitive.  Does she disobey? Of course.  On purpose? Of course. Does she scream “NO?” Of course.  This is all par for the course.  I’ve got my game plan.  She disobeys.  I have three options, redirect, try to positively steer her towards making a good decision, or sternly correct her.

Number three is where the plan fails.  Sometimes situations call for quick fast correction.  No, you may not run out into the street.  No, you may not take Mommy’s $150 sunglasses and see how far the arms bend out.  No, you may not open the hot oven and put your head inside.

I was ready for the stubborn-foot-stomping-house-shaking fits.  I was not ready for the sudden you-just-crushed-my-soul-broke-my-heart sobbing.  She’s not mad about being corrected nor fighting back; she is devastated that she has done something to upset me so badly.  She cries and sobs and immediately wants to cling to Mommy or Mama.  It’s heart wrenching.

I secretly hoped that our daughter was a sociopath.  I hoped, I didn’t just crush her heart, and that really she learned to manipulate people already.  All hopes of my daughter being mentally deranged ended yesterday with an episode of Mickey Mouse Club House (see previous post about her obsession with this show).

I wasn’t paying a lot of attention (I’m not a huge MMCH fan).  And all of a sudden, Loren burst out with a sob the likes of which I cannot explain.  I jumped up and examined her for injury.  She was sobbing and yammering in her Loren-speak no one understands.  I could find nothing wrong, when I notice her pointing at the TV.

A new puppy was on the show and Pluto wasn’t getting the attention he needed and left sad and dejected.  She was sobbing because Pluto was sad, even once the MMCH crew made up with him, my daughter was still sobbing lightly in my arms.

Now, I find myself unprepared with a sensitive child whose heart I break into a million little pieces every time I have to use my mommy voice.   You win child, you win.


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5 thoughts on “I Secretly Hoped our Daughter was a Sociopath

  1. As the mom of a super highly sensitive girl, I will tell you it gets worse (sorry) and the heart wrenching “I just crushed my baby girl” never goes away. 😦 The worse news is I am learning that our parenting style often fosters this and it is “our” fault that they become that way- GASP!!! Can you believe it?! Congratulations on # 16 almost to the top 15…

  2. My son is this way. There is a book called “The Highly Sensitive Child.” I suggest you check it out. It has helped me to understand my son and the best way to parent him in more ways than I can list here. If I even look at him cross-eyed he sobs and says, “I’m a horrible boy!” whereas his 3 year old sister will just laugh at me, hit me again and move on. So it helps to get some perspective because I have to parent my kids very differently. Check out the book, I swear it helps! 🙂

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