>I think the excitement, the newness, the panic and the overwhelmingness is starting to wear off.
I think for the last 26 days all of those things have kept me (us?) running at full capacity.
Yesterday I noticed a change. Around 2:30 pm I hit a wall. I was sitting at my desk at work, it’s been an extremely busy week and suddenly I felt like I was in a fog. My fear that I might have hit exhaustion was confirmed on the drive home. I didn’t get pissed at ANY drivers that cut me off or slowed me down, I wasn’t irritated when I just missed the green light, and I didn’t even sing along to radio…I just drove.
Part of me feels guilty. Like I should be enjoying all of this time…we are only 26 days in, how exhausted could I possibly be? When I got home Loren was fussy (gas…again) and she couldn’t get comfortable. I feel bad for her, it makes me want to cry (which I did a little of yesterday) but for the most part I remained in my fog.
Last night was a long night, more so for Melissa than me. She knew I was tired and took Loren to the living room every time she woke up (which seemed like 1000 times) to let me get as much sleep as possible.
I do feel a little better today, less foggy. I’m hoping yesterday was just a fluke and it’s not the new way life is…